Feet of Clay?

This was a tough summer.  Full of joy, really--I'm not complaining.  I took on some pretty big goals and set my sights high, and by September, I was exhausted.  Today I'm looking back on the challenges and triumphs.  I'm also looking ahead to tomorrow.  Staying at home with my girls has always been important to me so that I could put them first, but balancing motherhood with a business run from home is just plain hard!  There has been more than one discussion where I said, "let's just close the online shop.  Forget it."

So I guess I'm wondering if my feet are made of clay or something stronger.  The expression "feet of clay" in modern day vernacular has its roots in the Bible.  In the book of Daniel, Daniel analyzes King Nebuchadnezzar's dream that involved a statue whose feet were created of clay and iron.  This symbolized that the base of this statue had parts that were weak and parts that were strong.  In modern day culture, when people are said to have "feet of clay", they are considered untrustworthy or likely to turn and run when the going gets tough.  

I'll be the first to admit that time management is totally not my strength.  I have to be very diligent to get anywhere on time.  Clay itself goes through a series of processes before it is a complete, useful vessel (a big metaphor for another day).  I mention that only to drive the point home that my estimation of how much time it will take to create, dry, fire, glaze, and re-fire a clay piece is a big challenge for me.  Since 95% of my business is made up of custom orders, and many of them with a "deadline", this is the most stressful part of my work-from-home job.

There are times the orders aren't ready.  I can usually list a reason (illness, sleep strike, all-night nurse fest, hubby working overtime, etc).  It is terrible to have to tell a customer that their pieces aren't ready yet, and leaving someone dissatisfied makes me feel like I'm failing.  I feel on those days that I can only list weaknesses, not my strengths.  That I'm made mostly of unfired clay that will crumble or shatter.  I have to be careful on those days to list the blessings that have come from becoming the "Stay-Art-Home Mom."  I dig through and find the iron parts, those strengths.  In the end, the shop stays open, and I pray that God will help me overcome my crazy lack of understanding when it comes to time.  I know He can, because I can tell how much I've changed and how much I've learned when I look back to the day I opened my Etsy shop in January 2012.

Blessings,
Lauren